I don't like 'stability' per se. I loved working for my mum's youth project and Table Tennis coaching as a teen, but working didn't bring me happiness. The money was good and it was enlightening to work amongst people from outside of my own 'walk of life'. At the same time it quickly began to feel like some sort of guilded cage, the wages feeling increasingly like some contrived buy-out for my actual potential and less like payment for services rendered. I probably only worked as long as I did because temping made the boredom bearable. Nothing feels as 'epiphany forming' as some of the colleagues you may have out there in the administrative world.
All I saw was sad sights; a woman who at the age of 40 odd who is both beautiful and childless is a tragedy in my eyes, just as much as an 'old girl' from the age where you had one job for life trying to cling on to her employment. The amount of people my age who I met whilst working, who like me had ambitions and goals they had put on hold for the sake of stability.
I was really fortunate, I was dating a really ambitious girl at the same time my friend decided to go study medicine. That was the catalyst.
I decided there was NO WAY I was gonna work for somebody elses company, putting all of my energies into an organisation I had no vested interest in, ultimately to accumulate wages and spend them being adorned with 'the respected names of other people' and likewise pieces of respectable material possesions. Pass.
I don't have to make sense to you... Lord knows none of you people make sense to me.
I'm never fully content so I try to get more, I'm greedy, I haven't got a conceited sense of entitlement and it's not money I define success by.
I know myself, therefore I know I could be better at 'being me'. I'm only ever trying to out-do 'BizzyDot'.
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