I must admit... I've been 'gone for a while now'.
The last time I posted something on here was weeks ago, and that was lackluster in comparison to my previous workrate...
All I can say is my head hasn't been in the right place
Life's tough at the best of times, and it doesn't help when you're in the habit of sabotaging your own life. In the last 3 yrs I have fallen out of contact with my ex, as well as lot of family and friends. You can't blame anyone else for things you're responsible for, so I've been down without any way to get it off my chest. No one wants to be around 'the vacuum in the room'.
Even though I've put myself in a better career position than I could've imagined years ago and I have a great Girlfriend who's also been a great friend, I'm stuck always reminiscing about her.
When there's only one person you really want to speak to, and you can't, it's kinda like being...
Lost in space.
It's all good though, I've kinda come to a point where I finally feel like I have some understanding of the way my actions impacted her, how it felt to be perpetually seeking the attention of someone so clearly lacking an understanding of how you're thinking or feeling.
It's learning curves and growth init, I'll be the first one to admit guilt - It's all actually my fault.
All I can do is live and learn, things are good right now, even if I'm not. I'm on my grind and quite a few things have happened since the last time I posted a blog.
O.o
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